Sharper Image isn't What I thought it was
Tuesday, October 17, 2006 | Original Musings by
Jen
While browsing Sharper Image online today while looking for a piece of luggage my friend has, I realized a few things...... sharper image just isn't a place for men and their toys. They have so much more to offer....
They bring back versions of our favorite 80s toys. Yes, we had a pair of these and I'm not so sure they're not out in the garage with my brothers Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and GI Joe Sets.
For a mere $29.95, you can relive those childhood memories with the updated version:
Also, when we were kids, if we wanted to play Star Wars, we had to use the tubes from Christmas wrapping paper to be a sword or a lightsaber.
Have a stalker on your Christmas list? SI advertises this item as:
Turns out, Mom can have fun at sharper image with the wide variety of, *ahem*, personal massagers they have.....
- raceful 9-inch personal massager delivers soothing oscillating vibrations whenever and wherever you want to relax, ease tension or just feel good.
- Powerful-but-quiet single-speed motor is vibration-dampened so massaging action is focused in the soft, flexible, spring-mounted head — and not in your hand.
- Cordless design never needs batteries.
- Weighs just 9 oz
So, what did we learn today kids? Yep, Sharper Image is no longer just for dads.
I never did find the suitcase I was looking for, but found lots of other things that might make it's way under the family Christmas trees this year...... and that sharper image gift certificate isn't just for the gadget geek anymore...
Award Winning Essayist Sentenced in Drug Case
Stories like this never cease to amuse me. So, because she wrote some essay over a decade ago, this is news? If you wrote down your beliefs at 14 and reread them 10 years later, would you have the same outlook, values, and beliefs? This story is sad, not because of what she did, but because there are 100s more right behind her.....
KANSAS CITY, Mo. (AP) - A woman who was honored a decade ago for an essay about avoiding drugs and alcohol has been ordered to spend the next decade in federal prison for distributing meth.
Susan M. Gardner, 24, of Independence (yes, folks, Indepedence is the Meth capital of the US), sold methamphetamine to undercover detectives four times and led police on a chase before she was arrested with another package of the drug stuffed in her pants.
In imposing the sentence of 10 years and one month in prison on Wednesday, U.S. District Judge Gary Fenner said Gardner had the capacity to live a productive life (everyone has the capacity, some just chose to concentrate their efforts on less legal avenues). But, he said, there was a price she had to pay for her actions.
"You were significantly involved with the distribution of drugs in this community,'' Fenner said. "That's something that has to be taken seriously and cannot be tolerated.''
Fenner said he would recommend that Gardner be sent to a prison where she can enroll in a 500-hour substance-abuse program (why don't all people get this option, or just ones that wrote a cute-essay over a decade ago? Rehab... what a novel idea..... /sarcasm).
Defense attorney Robert Kuchar said it was a "sad situation.''
"We're dealing with a decent young lady who made some bad decisions in her life,'' he said. (*ahem* A bad decision is trying wearing shorts to NV on Friday night, let's call a spade a spade here...)
When Garden was in eighth grade (really, what do you know when you're 14???), the Missouri Peace Officers Association picked her essay as the best of more than 400 other entries, according to news accounts (I can write an essay on almost anything, doesn't mean I believe it. Ask me about my market report on Ethanol pros.).
Gardner declined to speak on her behalf before she was sentenced.
(Copyright 2006 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)
Labels:
When the Doorbell Rings, God, I hope it's the Mormons
Last night, my doorbell rings, which causes havoc on the whole house. The cat runs, the dog barks and my daughter starts screeming. It's a lil cub scout selling popcorn tins. Calls me Ma'am. Strike one.
Strike two, little kid (8ish?) walking door to door without a parent at almost-dark. While I realize that is how I sold Girl Scout cookies (like 20 years ago! god I'm old) and we live in the 'burbs, I still hate the idea of this.
I tell him that if he buys the trash bags that our school is selling, I'll buy his over priced popcorn tin. The reply was, "but lady, I don't have any money." Pathetic, but adorable.
I bought it anyway.
Why did I want the Mormon Missionaries instead? They're easier to say no to.
About once a week it seems for the last 2 months, I'm getting hit up for something. Wrapping paper, trash bags, cookies, popcorn, and life insurance. But that was a guy who had a 5o'clock shadow at 11 am on a Saturday. I was less indulging to him than the little cub last night.
Private organization like the cub scouts don't bother me to the same degree as school fund-raising. What's the deal with the schools turning this into a requirement? If you don't sell, they not so subtly let you know they noticed.
What is wrong with the funding to our schools that we HAVE to do this so the teachers can have a microwave in their break room or the teachers can have supplemental supplies?
What if we spent 90 minutes tonight talking about which legislators we could lobby for education reform instead of which fund raiser is next?
What if we went door to door with a petition instead of Catalogs of crapola made by child slave labor in a foreign country?
What if we had the whole meeting at TKs Grill instead of the "after meeting"? Ok, I have no idea how that is socially responsible, but A LOT more fun).
You get the idea.
This Killed My Horny
Screech and His Porn.
I really meant to write on this last week, but a lot was going on.
I know you've heard about it by now. I know you know it involved a dirty sanchez . I know you know its bad porn.
I mean its one thing when a celebrity does it for their own entertainment and then the tape ends up in the wrong hands (Pamela and Tommy, Paris Hilton and that guy, etc).
It's entirely a different thing though when a celebrity records themselves in an *ahem* intimate moment for the sole purpose of selling it.
While thinking about blogging about this, there were several direction I could take this blog….
Possible Direction #1 - Rant about another example of childhood actors and how they grow up to be such losers.
Possible Direction #2 - Pure Economics. Marketing and production are about supply and demand. He supplied the tape, but where is the demand? The show was canceled in 1997. Are there a bunch of screech groupies demanding this type of paraphernalia?
Possible Direction #3 – Was the "dirty sanchez" purely urban legend until he decided to act on it? After watching the "40 year old Virgin", I admit, I had to wiki it just to find out what it meant. I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Wiki is also good for other information such as: In the May 2006 issue of Stuff magazine the readers voted Diamond the 3rd most annoying former child actor that they would like to punch in the face. He was beaten by former child stars Danny Bonaduce and Corey Feldman.
Possible Direction #4 – Don't give you kids a porn name from the beginning. Which is worse? Screech or Dustin Diamond? Do you know your porn name? (If you get your first pets name and put it after the first street's name where you lived, you come up with a great porno name.)
(ok, not sure what this has to do with porn name, other than I googled it and this was in the top 10 results!)
Possible Direction #5 – Where does this porn rank among porn for purely entertainment value? Above bestiality but below midgets? You tell me…..
(golf award found when I google "porn award", also humorous)
Lastly, we all know the age-old question about if a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound.? Along that line.…. If you make porn and no one watches it…… is it really porn? Or just a sex tape no one wants to see?
Subscribe To
Posts
All Comments
Post-Tri Hug
You did it Mommy!
Me!
Hood To Coast Relay 2007
