SimplyComplexJen

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Overwhelmed.

It's a word that has such depth, but is seemingly simple.

I know we (I) bring a lot of it on ourselves. So much to accomplish, so little time.

There's so much I've been trying this year (much to the detriment of my triathlon training) to make our lives simpler and more organic. What I didn't plan for in all my planning for our garden and hiking and other activities is what I was going to remove from my life to accommodate all these changes.

Planned workouts seemed to fall by the wayside the easiest, but I haven't let them go. Meaning, everyday my planned workout is on my list, and every day for the last 3 weeks (except 4 days), it's gotten bumped for other things.

Tomorrow's yoga? Bumped by having a 2 week late birthday dinner with a friend on my night where bebe is at her dads.

Today's lunch workout? Bumped by the fact I need to go to Lowe's to buy fencing supplies for the workers that will be there tomorrow.

Last night?  Stay up late working on project for Bebe's school program this Saturday.  

and on and on it goes. I thought I was working closer to balance, not throwing myself off more.

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Turn off the tv?  No problem.  I probably only watch an hour a night, and Bebe is only allowed 30 min a night during the school week, IF she has all her homework and household duties done.  So, I sat here for a moment thinking how well we are doing.

But you know what they say about pride.....


Then it hit me.  My vice isn't TV.  I could care less about the media-created "American Idol" (don't get me started on so-called reality TV) or who did it on CSI.  I.don't.care.  I think Reality TV represents the worst of our culture and also the decline of society in general.  Just my opinion.

My vice?  The laptop.  Hands Down.


Too often I will log on in the evening knowing there are clothes to iron, and dishes in the sink, and yet will log onto the laptop for "just 5 min" to check email.  I should know better.  Before I know it, it's not 9:05, but 11:05 and *sigh* yet again, I wasted another evening.


*thunk*

So, instead of "Turn off the TV" week, in our home it will be the Digital Detox Week.  After all, I spend 8-9 hours a day in this chair staring at this monitor.  Do I really need another 2-3 hours a night staring at a monitor at home?



What can be accomplished?  Let's find out........

I love this picture. To me, it represents the best moment of the Triathlon (well, the best two).

After the swim I struggled with, I was on my bike, struggling up a hill and struggling to keep my cramp at bay. About the time I was wondering why the hell I was keeping going, I get to the top of the hill and I hear, "GOOOOOOO MOMMMMMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" really loud.

My brother, future SIL, and my daughter were at this intersection. Fortuitously they were late and unable to enter the park and the Sheriff had stopped them at an intersection. The first intersection at the top of the first hill of my 12 mile ride.

It was meant to be.

At that moment, the race was no longer about protecting my ego and simply finishing to avoid the embarrassment of a DNF. Now, it became something much bigger and much more important. It was about showing my daughter the results of those workouts I had sacrificed some of my precious time with her for (as a single parent, I feel so much of our time is eaten away by "have tos"). I needed to show her that you don't quit.


This hug post race meant the world to me, and I'm so glad my friend captured this picture, because to me, it emodies the spirit of my race.

(if the moment on my bike was the best moment, finishing was the 2nd best!)

First of all, to get to a 7am PAC breakfast, that means a 5am run on EASTERN time (I'm a CST kind of girl).

Then, the hotel gym and pool are only open 9am-9pm, so that means no weights or swimming while here, because frankly I'm working from 7am-11pm (yes, we finally finished our dinner at 11pm last night). There's only so many squats, situps, and crunches I can do in my room before getting bored.

Alcohol. There's a lot of it here. It's free. Everyone is doing it. Hard to resist "just one" glass of wine (because it doesn't seem to stop there). The first reception of the NGFA I did have tonic and lime with the intent to run later, but again, a late dinner with customers derailed that plan.

I know being "off" for 3 days wouldn't hurt a normal person, but I already get sidetracked from my planned workouts with just normal mommyness stuff that comes up. I swear that if it wasn't for lunchtime workouts, I would never be able to do this. Even those gets sidetracked by the activity the pays my mortgage. Some days, it's just too hard to leave the office and walk the 100 yards to the gym. I need to be better about walking away from 75 minutes. No one will die.

So, heading home today then my next challenge is not to be too sidetracked by my dad being in town for the first time in years. He'll just have to understand, and maybe even come run with me ;)

So, today wasn't a total loss. Up at 520, run 3.5 miles, PAC breakfast at 7am, then general session at 8am..... I'm on a roll!

(isn't it great that I can post this from my blackberry while listening to the blah blah blah of legislative concerns within our industry?)

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I'm old.

I went to register for school this week at UMKC ..... all the "kids" sitting at the counter at admissions were 18, and I felt like I was 80. I could just tell they were probably thinking.... she's too old to be here.

Also, I joined the PTO of where my daughter attends pre-school this week.

I'm doing a fundraiser for my daughters school. Yes, I'm one of those annoying people that will hit you up to buy an Entertainment book.



All of a sudden, I feel old. Moms are supposed to be older, wiser, wear "mom-jeans" and cut coupons. 


Not uncertain about life, unorganized, and still looking for love (yes, in proably all the wrong places).

I can't be old, I was just at a party last weekend, where someone thought it was fun to bring jello-shots. I still like going to hear live music at the (old) Hurricane, Lawerence, etc.

I watch adult-swim for goodness sake!!!!! Those are cartoons.....

The PTO????? What was I thinking?


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